


==> Be the Shrimp

by Heir of Hope (ColorsofaYinYang)



Series: HaikyuuStuck [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!, Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - Homestuck Fusion, Bickering, Dialogue Heavy, Humor, M/M, Pesterlog(s) (Homestuck)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-30
Updated: 2018-07-30
Packaged: 2019-06-18 10:51:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15484134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ColorsofaYinYang/pseuds/Heir%20of%20Hope
Summary: You are now Hinata Shouyou. You decide to list all the information you know about this game in an attempt to understand what the heck is going on:1) There's these big machines in your house.2) There's a weird spirit thing following you around.3) There's also a huge meteor coming that's going to destroy your whole neighborhood in a couple minutes.4) Your host player is an IDIOT.





	==> Be the Shrimp

**Author's Note:**

> The colored text looks best on a white background!
> 
> Universe Report #3: All five of the Karasuno freshmen go to the same school, BUT they live in different neighborhoods/areas, which prevents them from seeing each other outside of school (hence why they are also internet buddies/have a chat). The only two who ever see each other outside of school are Yamaguchi and Tsukishima, who live closer together than the others.
> 
> Read part 1 first to understand the story, but so far it's following Homestuck pretty closely so it's not completely necessary.

\-- tinyGiant [TG] began pestering adamantTosser [AT] at 17:10 --

TG: bakageyama what are u doing?!  
AT: Sorry. im trying to figure out the controls  
TG: did u put my bed on the roof?!  
AT: Yes  
AT: Sorry not sorry  


Ugh. Hinata groans and lets his head fall back, staring up at the ceiling. Which apparently his bed is now on the other side of. Kageyama can be such an idiot sometimes! He's an impulsive idiot with a terrifying face and a terrible temper and really nice blue eyes and amazing volleyball skills... 

Quit getting sidetracked! He mentally scolds himself. He then immediately gets distracted by the sound of a car starting up outside. He peers out his window to see Dad driving away. Maybe he forgot something at work? His two volleyballs and his cell phone are still lying in the yard. Hinata sincerely hopes his Dad didn't notice the bed on the roof. 

TG: um can u do me a favor?  
TG: could u maybe grab that stuff outside and bring it in.  
TG: please.  
AT: Sure  
AT: Looks like its out of range  
TG: awww...  
AT: Give me a second  


There's a clunking noise, and suddenly there's a weird extention to his room! Then a large machine drops from out of nowhere into the newly created space, causing the whole house to shake a bit. Hinata blinks once, then decides to ignore everything strange about this situation in favor of examining the new machine. It looks neat! 

His computer pings. 

AT: I guess making the room bigger cost some grist? but the big machine didnt cost anything  
TG: ok! what does it do?  
AT: U have to find out, dumbass  
AT: I can only drop stuff and move it around  
TG: i wanna move stuff around too! how do i do that?  
AT: Im pretty sure only the server can do that  
AT: Didnt u get both discs?  
TG: no...  
AT: Well lets hope u get one soon so i can stop pestering tsukishima  
AT: I  
AT: Hate that guy  
TG: arent we all supposed to be friends.  
AT: I use the term "friends" lightly  
AT: Anyway move to the corner, ill get the stuff u threw out the window  
AT: Why did u throw it outside anyway?  
TG: my sylladex works weird.  
TG: what modus do u use?  
AT: Target  
TG: that sounds stupid.  
AT: Ur stupid

Hinata makes a face but goes to stand in the corner of the room. The two volleyballs and his cell phone float through the open window and come to rest near his feet. He waves his thanks to the sky, assuming Kageyama can see him. Otherwise he just looks crazy. 

The house shakes once more. He grabs his phone and opens the Pesterchum app. Dang, already at 50%? Man, his phone battery sucks. 

TG: why is the floor shaking?  
TG: are u dropping more stuff in my house?  
AT: Yeah two more giant machines  
AT: Theres one on ur balcony and one downstairs  
TG: what r they for?  
AT: No clue

He heads out to the balcony to check out the new machine. It's a big platformy thing! He has absolutely no clue what to do with it. After staring at it for a while, his phone pings, signalling a new message. 

TG: im on the balcony now! im messaging from my phone.  
AT: The one u threw out the window  
TG: no it flew out of my sylladex after i spiked a ball at it.  
AT: What  
TG: its complicatid.  
AT: Ok whatever  
AT: Ur bathroom is a mess, did u do that too?  
TG: stop snooping around! what do u mean?  
AT: Theres a cake in the toilet  


Crap. He DID leave his birthday cake balancing on the edge of the tank... he should have known gravity would seek revenge against him for being able to jump so high. He's going to have to play it off somehow. 

TG: yes.  


Nailed it. 

AT: Im going to try and clean it  
TG: ok go ahead.  
TG: i guess ill ask someone else for help since u dont seem to know anything.  
AT: U dont know anything either dumbass  


He scans his list of contacts. He definitely does NOT want to ask Tsukishima for help (he's not THAT desperate), although he admittedly would probably know what to do. And it looks like Yachi's still not online yet. Which leaves only one option! 

\-- tinyGiant [TG] began pestering trueCompanion [TC] at 17:16 -- 

TG: hey yamaguchi!  
TG: thanks for wishing me happy birthday!  
TG: also can i ask u for some advice?  
TC: (^u^) of course! although I can't help you if it's about Kageyama again... ~  
TG: no its not! also pls dont mention that to him.  
TG: its super emmbarrassing.  
TC: I will not mention it! It is our secret ~  
TC: so what's up then? ~  
TG: im playing sburb.  
TC: ?? what's sburb? ~  
TG: its this game,  
TG: i was looking forward to playing it but...  
TG: i have no idea what im doing.  
TC: (^0^) sounds fun! but you know, Tsukki's much better at computer stuff than I am... ~  
TG: aww but i dont want to ask him...  
TG: u hang out with him a lot right? im sure u picked up on some stuff.  
TC: (-^~^-) I guess so...   
TC: what exactly are you stuck on? ~  
TG: theres these machines in my house and i dont know what to do with them.  
TC: ok, well... I'm assuming they work together somehow, since they're from the same game, right? ~  
TC: did you look at all of them yet? ~  
TG: nope!  
TC: I'd take a look at the others then. maybe you're supposed to use them in a specific order! and hopefully everything will click into place once you see the other ones! ~  
TG: ok! thanks! u know ur actually really smart right?  
TC: (-^u^-) I'm not, but thank you! ~  


Aw, Yamaguchi's always so humble. Hinata takes one more look at the platformy machine and... yeah, he still has no clue what to do with it. There IS still one more machine to check out... He heads out and down the hall littered with brooms, but as he passes the bathroom door he hears a loud crack. Then his phone pings. 

AT: Shit  
TG: stop swearing bakageyama! what did u do?  
TG: also what was that noise? should i investigate?  
AT: No  
AT: Under no circumstance investigate  


Of course he doesn't listen and peeks into the bathroom. The whole toilet has been uprooted, cake and all, and has been placed besides a large hole in the floor. Hinata groans. 

TG: what the heck happened.  
AT: Just get out of the way, i think i can fix it  
AT: Go look at the thing i put in the living room  


Hinata sticks his tongue out at the ceiling. Again, hopefully Kageyama can see him, otherwise he's just acting like a nutcase. He makes his way to the living room, taking extra precaution on the stairs once more. Another large machine is blocking the door! Looks like there's no way around it. Ugh. Overhead, the toilet floats by. Looks like Kageyama's cleaning up his mess... 

And then it drops onto the machine. There's water and cake everywhere! And the toilet is now destroyed. Great. 

TG: BAKAGEYAMAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!  
AT: Sorry okay?! my wireless keeps breaking down  
AT: Because apparently our router isnt volleyball proof  
AT: I would find a better connection but i dont really want to see my father right now, i already fought him once today  
TG: same.  
AT: Oh yeah because ur parent is so bad  
AT: Meatbuns, brooms and an understanding about how volleyball works, what a tragic life  
AT: Ur not the one that has to deal with constant analogies and japanese literature everywhere  
TG: why dont u just go outside? u could catch the neighbors signal.  
AT: U do remember where i live right? or did u hit urself in the face with a ball again  
TG: oh right, ur "house-alone-in-the-middle-of-the-woods" thing.  
TG: i still think thats stupid.  


As Hinata examines the machine, a glowing orange orb rises up from the newly opened (smashed) cylinder on the top. A timer appears on the side, counting down from ten minutes. 

TG: why is there a timer..?   
AT: Hold up let me look at the walkthroughs  
TG: of course u need a walkthrough.  
AT: Shut up dumbass  
AT: Ok take a thing from the machine  


Hinata nervously looks at the orange orb hovering above, but it doesn't seem to be doing much so he shrugs it off. After a few seconds he realizes he has to turn the wheel on the machine, and does so. An orange cylinder pops out, and he captchalogues it. A small card appears out of thin air and drops onto his head. Huh, it looks like a captchalogue card, but it has holes in it. He captchalogues that too, automatically assuming that Kageyama had dropped it using his computer powers. The orange orb drifts behind him, making a strange crackling noise. 

AT: Ok now go back to your room and use that card  
AT: We should probably hurry, that countdown doesnt look good  
TG: ok but this thing is following me! a little help?  
AT: God what is this walkthrough  
AT: I guess its called the kernelsprite? we need to prototype it  
AT: Whatever the hell that means  
TG: ill probably regret this but just do whatever u think we should do.  


Kageyama lifts a painting off the wall and it is absorbed by the orange orb. It morphs with a bright glow into... into... 

Oh god no. 

TG: im already regretting it.  
TG: out of all the paintings u had to choose the creepy dragon one.  
AT: It wasnt on purpose! i cant see whats on them from my pespective  
AT: Anyway, it looks like we have to do another prototyping later, so u just have to live with the dragon for now  


Ugh. Fine. Hinata makes a face at the floating orange lizard face. God. It's horrific. Its forked tongue and weird frill and icky scales... ugh. He decides to block the sprite from his mind and backtracks up to the balcony. Along the way he gets another message. He groans. "What is it Kageya-" 

Oh. Yachi! 

\-- uncertainAnxiety [UA] began pestering tinyGiant [TG] at 17:30 --

UA: u-um, hi Hinata! happy birthday!  
TG: thanks yachi! id love to chat with u more but im kind of on the clock rn.  
TG: bakageyamas destroying my house.  
UA: K-Kageyama-kun is over at your house?  
TG: not quite... were playing sburb.  
UA: r-really? I was thinking of playing too! maybe we can play together?  
UA: I-I mean after the game comes of course...  
TG: sure! that sounds like fun! im sure ur a much more fun coplayer than kageyama. :P  
UA: o-ok! I hope you finish whatever you're doing on time then!  


\-- uncertainAnxiety [UA] ceased pestering tinyGiant [TG] at 17:31 -- 

Right. Clock. Timer. Machine in his room. He rushes upstairs and (after hitting a volleyball at it) puts the card in the slot on the machine. He squints at the fine print on the instruction card on the machine. Clamp a cruxite dowel into the totem lathe. He has no idea what that means. Maybe it's this orange thingy? He spikes it out of its card as well and puts it in the machine. The orange cylinder starts spinning and the little arm comes down to start carving at it. Looks like it'll be a while. Time to head to the balcony and save time by figuring out what to do with the other machine. 

He trips over a broom in the hallway and faceplants into the floor. Ouch. His face is flushed with embarrassment once he gets up. No one can ever know. 

Once he gets to the balcony he gives the machine another once over. Yeah... he still has no clue what to do with this. There's a little circle pad on the machine, maybe the orange thing goes there next? Hell if he knows. 

The sound of his Dad's car distracts him again, and he watches as he pulls into the driveway with someone else in the passenger seat. Another man steps out of the car, a man with dark curly hair and glasses. Is that...? 

TG: kageyama why is ur dad at my house?  
AT: What?!  
AT: Oh  
AT: My god  
AT: I have no clue  
AT: That is really awkward  


Hinata watches as the two men enter the house, a little bewildered. Kageyama lives kind of far away, so why is his father here? He's lost in thought, but then something in the sky catches his attention. It looks like a meteor. And it's heading toward his house. 

TG: i dont care about why ur dads here anymore theres a meteor heading for my house!  
AT: What?! is it part of the game?!  
TG: i dont know maybe! what do i do?!  
AT: Uhh  
TG: dont take the time to "uhh" at me! what do i do?!  
AT: It says "take the carved totem to the alchemiter"  
AT: Thats the machine on ur balcony i think  


\-- adamantTosser [AT] is no longer connected! -- 

In light of this new startling development, Hinata rushes back to his room, instinctively dodging all the brooms. He can hear his Dad and Kageyama's father talking downstairs, but about what he can't quite make out. But someone's messaging him on his phone. Curse his short attention span.

\-- tauntinglyTall [TT] began pestering tinyGiant [TG] at 17:37 -- 

TT: I heard you recieved the package.  
TT: You better appreciate how many mediocre sports stores I had to search through to find that.  
TT: Are you there?  
TG: the volleyball was really cool, but i dont have time to talk!  
TG: im playing sburb and bakageyamas breaking everything in my house  
TT: I told you that game was no good.  
TG: and now i have about two minutes before a meteor comes and hits my house!  
TT: What type of meteor?  
TG: how should i know?!  
TG: i have to go now, talk to u later if im not dead.  
TT: Is it iron or stone?  
TT: Iron meteorites are heavier, while stone meteors are more diverse. The iron meteors are also much more dense and have magnetic properties. In comparison, stone meteorites may contain small grains called “chondrules”, making them “chondrites”. These are generally magnetic. “Achondrites”, the meteors without “chondrules”, contain little to no iron, so they are not magnetic.  
TT: There is also a third category, Stony-Iron meteorites, but they are extremely rare and consist of equal amounts of stone and nickel-iron. This category is further divided into “pallasites”, in which the meteorite is packed with olivine crystals, and “mesosiderites”, which contain nickel-iron and silicates. These are very rare, and there have only ever been a few discovered.  
TT: But I realize most of this is irrelevant and you don't understand half of it anyway.  
TT: Don't die. The King would never get over it.  


Hinata rushes to grab the orange thing from his bedroom. Looks like it's finally done! Now all that's left is to put it on the balcony-machine. 

The meteor looms overhead as he sprints out into the hot summer air. The orange totem is placed on the machine. The totem is scanned; an orange tree, created. A single orange falls into Hinata's awaiting hands. 

The timer ticks down. 

The meteor hits.

**Author's Note:**

> Tsukishima is so hard to write. Imagine me at six in the morning typing "meteor facts" into the Google search bar and furiously taking notes in a spiral notebook.
> 
> Also I realize it’s “Little/Small Giant” but Tiny Giant fits the naming schema so...


End file.
